On the Road

fuck fuck FUCKITY FUCK

Thanks for ruining Oscar night, jerk…

You know, THIS is why I have trust issues

Assholes like YOU

Who text me and call me and message me so that you become a part of my weekly, if not daily, life. I took such a huge risk for you, you can’t even appreciate it or know its extent.

And then to just up and ignore me out of the blue? And when I give you a way out you still ignore it? I got over you! I got angry and moved on. How dare you insinuate that I was “playing games” and THAT’S why you ignored me. I am currently an emotional wreck over whether or not I’m hurting one of my good friend’s feelings just by talking to him! 

I can’t believe you actually thought I was capable of that. 

And then to just pop back into my life with a stupid do-it-yourself internet song formula asking me out? “Oh, I thought you would get a laugh out of it”

THE FUCK?

Don’t use your psychology shtick on me, babe. I know I have problems, but when YOU ignore me and when YOU don’t give me enough time to let you in then yeah I’m going to be “coy” with what information I give you. I’m done being the “emotional slut” so to say and I thought you of all people would understand. 

“You will never get anywhere if you make the people in your present pay for the mistakes of the people from your past”

WELL THEN DON’T JUST UP AND IGNORE ME. TALK TO ME. Tell me what’s bothering you!

I just….I don’t even know what to make of this. I kind of feel like crying but at the same time I feel like I’m done with acting like that. 

Just….FUCK